There’s a perception amongst us poor misguided men folk, that women who dress ‘a certain way’ for work only do so to appear powerful. They need to do this to compete with the men don’t they? It’s nothing to do with simply wanting to dress, well, well - is it?
Seriously, why do women put on their killer Jimmy Choo heals, don their immaculately tailored Channel suit and deposit their MacBook or iPad in the latest Balenciaga handbag? Is it to scare us? Is it to make up for years of misogyny in the workplace? Is it to compete with us, the men? Or is it to appear confident and in control?
It’s an interesting question and it reminded me of THE fateful day I interviewed for a new job. Up until this revelatory episode in my life it’s safe to assume dear reader that how I looked at work, and what that said about me, never registered. That is until THE day...
Until THE day I ran my own business. (Still do.) I worked from home – just me, the email, mobile and the cats for company. And anyone who does this knows that there are times when you spend your time in just a t-shirt and a pair of tracky bottoms. It’s easy. No one’s going to see you and you don’t even have to shower if you don’t want to! Bliss!
Fast forward to THE day. At the allotted hour, in walked Yvonne (names have been changed to protect the innocent).
She looked amazing. Sophisticated, casual, with immaculate hair, nails and the aforementioned killer heels all on deadly show, all delivering me the message that she was confident, savvy, impressive and inspiring. Oh and most definitely in CONTROL.
I was immediately scared and seduced in equal measure. I wanted to impress her, and I wanted her to like me. But I knew I needed to work hard – no question. This wasn’t going to be easy. Within the first few seconds of meeting her I was inspired, I was hooked. I was also worried.
And it wasn’t just about what I was going to say. I was also immediately aware of how I looked and I knew it probably wasn’t pretty. I felt a little compromised and shabby. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t look slovenly; I’d showered, put a pair of jeans on, was wearing my old faithful brogues and a cord jacket for God’s sake; but I looked, I don’t know, anonymous? Average? Especially next to Yvonne.
Everything about what she was wearing exuded quality and sophistication. Here was a woman, who knew what she was about, who knew how successful she was, who wasn’t afraid of anyone or anything. Here was a woman in CONTROL. She exuded quality and confidence. And I didn’t.
And for the first time in a long time, I worried that someone would judge me because of the way I looked.
Ironic, eh?
So what did I do? Well I got through the interview. And I made it through the second and third one too, and I got the job.
And I also went shopping!
Why? Because here I was heading into one of the most serious working environments I had ever been in. I don’t mean not fun; I mean ‘we take our role seriously and we are the best at what we do’ serious. I was (I am) proud to work there. And I was nervous and fearful that I wouldn’t always make the grade. So I had to appear confident and ‘fake it’ a little.
How?
Sometimes by making sure I looked the part!
So, yes, I went shopping. And I bought the best pair of shoes I ever bought (a pair of Grenson’s if you’re interested), as well as few other things. And it works.
On the days I’m not feeling it, I put on the shoes and don the new uniform and I assume the identity of a confident, knowledgeable and successful Talent Strategist. And you know what? It works, I instantly feel better. And when I feel good about myself, I feel good about what I can do. And I AM good at what I do.
So I get it. I understand. I am a power dresser myself. And I would always, always, always say to anyone dress to impress!
Yvonne, by the way, isn’t scary at all. She’s lovely. And she’s bloody impressive and excellent at what she does. I learn something new from every day.
Just goes to show, doesn’t it?
Love this blog. Dressing changes your mindset and is key for any woman looking to feel good about herself and wanting to climb the career ladder. It's not all about cost either, money can't buy style. I get my work things on eBay, charity shops (good ones in Woodbridge where I can pick up designer heels for £20)and the high street. Work your wardrobe girls!
Posted by: RechendaSmith | 22 July 2011 at 09:32 AM
Great reading Lynette, but WHO wrote it? You say it's from a man's perspective.. but which one?
Wish I could wear Jimmy Choos, afford a Balenciaga bag..... but then again in some circles these would symbolise a superficial attachment to trappings rather than content and be counter productive!
Posted by: Mary Hope | 23 July 2011 at 05:02 AM
Ah - an ex (male) coaching client of mine, absolutely lovely guy - thought it best to keep his identity secret! :)
Posted by: UKCP | 25 July 2011 at 03:33 AM